Over the years that I've been blogging, I've had several readers express a reluctance to comment on my posts, for fear that their lack of perfect spelling or punctuation will defile the grammatical purity of the Yeah, Write website. Nonsense! With that in mind, I now declare my 10-point Grammar Manifesto.
1. This is a No-Judgment Zone.
I do not ever correct a person's grammar (either spoken or written) unless I'm being paid to do so. Neither do I sit back with a false sense of superiority and ridicule other people's writing efforts, unless I'm being paid to do so (which would be an interesting gig, I admit). If you like having friends, you shouldn't run around correcting people's grammar either.
2. All Writers are Not Created Equal.
I hold professionally trained writers and editors to a higher standard. If I critique the word usage in an advertisement or a published book, it's only because there should be someone involved who knows better. If you own a business, and you don't know better—because you're a genius at selling shoes rather than at punctuating signs—just hire or bribe the biggest Word Nerd you know to proofread your store's marquee, flyers, and advertisements before exposing them to the public eye.
3. There's a Difference Between Formal and Informal Writing.
Every
attempt should be made to properly punctuate and spell research papers,
dissertations, resumes, corporate signage, advertisements, newspaper articles, and company memos. But blogs, blog comments,
Tweets, FaceBook statuses, and text messages all count as
informal communication. I will never look down on you for writing whatever comes to mind in a blog
comment. After all, you're probably just doing your best to respond in between chasing your toddler and folding laundry, and I'd rather have a quickly dashed-off comment than no comment at all.
4. Write Anyway!
When it comes to journaling, scrapbooking, and journal keeping, you should never let feelings of inferiority keep you from telling your story! Do not let the pressure to express yourself perfectly prevent you from expressing yourself at all. So much
insight is gained by exploring one's thoughts on paper or on a computer screen. Your perspective is invaluable to yourself and your family, whether or not you are the Queen of Run-on Sentences. Write your memories down. The more you write, the more you'll discover your voice and learn to express yourself clearly.
5. Practice Makes Progress.
The best way to improve your writing is to practice, to read things that are written well, and to look up the things you don't know. (Or ask me, and I'll try to help!) If you're paralyzed by feelings of insecurity, take a basic writing course through your local community education program to build your confidence. Think to yourself, "I'm capable of writing well. I just lack the practice." Then, if writing well is important to you, put in the time to work on your skills! (Notice that I didn't say "practice makes perfect." No piece of writing will ever be perfect, and that shouldn't be your goal.)
6. Authenticity Rules.
I would rather read something that's full of creativity, soul, and heart—but lacks proper grammar and punctuation—than a dry and boring treatise that doesn't have a single comma out of place. Remember that fiction writers and poets play fast and loose with grammar, often for a specific effect. For example, Pulitzer-Prize-winning author Cormac McCarthy completely omitted quotation marks to designate dialogue as well as apostrophes (cant instead of can't; dont instead of don't) in his powerful novel, The Road. And the revered poet e.e. cummings famously eschewed capitalization in his poetry—and in all of his correspondence, I believe.
7. No Editor is Infallible.
I do not know everything about grammar. I have a knack for it, I've taken multiple courses on the subject, I practice frequently, and I research questions that come up. But I'm no grammarian. A true grammarian would be familiar with all 37 pages of rules regarding the proper use of the comma in the Chicago Manual of Style. I fell asleep on page 2. However, I know my own pitfalls, and I always look things up when I'm not sure. (And I find myself looking up some of the same questions over and over again.)
8. Proofreading Matters.
I edit everything I write. You should know that impeccable sentences do not burst out of me intact. I write, I read what I've written, I futz around with it a bit, I futz around some more, and only then do I publish it.
9. You're Better at Math Than I Am.
Everyone has different strengths. Some of the most intelligent adults I know wouldn't stand a chance in a 3rd-grade spelling bee. I'm the only Word Nerd in my family of six children. That doesn't make the rest of them idiots. I can't do calculus like my brother Dan, and I don't have an encyclopedic knowledge of the internal organs like my sister Michele, nor can I recite the starting lineup of every NFL and NBA team since 1978 like my brother Jon. My gifts make me valuable in certain situations, just like their gifts make them valuable in other situations.
10. Scrabble Scores Do Not Predict Writing Ability.
So you suck at Scrabble, so what? That doesn't mean you can't be an interesting and engaging writer. My little brother Dan—who is 8 years younger than I am, spent more time studying math and science than English, makes his living as a nurse, and never EVER reads for pleasure—can kick my butt at Scrabble. He's some sort of prodigy, and he knows it. Rarely a game goes by without him getting a 50-point bonus for using all seven of his tiles in a single play. I'd accuse him of cheating, but I don't think it's possible to "mark tiles" the way poker sharks mark cards.
Questions? Comments? Let me hear 'em!