Yes, it's April Fools' Day, but this is no joke. Here is a task I have to complete twice weekly:
Bathe this dog in this bathtub. Convince her to stay put so her feet, which have a staph infection, can soak in the suds from the medicated shampoo. Then scour this bathtub. When the vet informed me that this was to be my task, I think my expression exactly mirrored Ruby's.
I know, baby, I know. You've got it rough.
Now for a bit of word nerd fun. It wasn't until college that I realized "bath" cannot be used as a verb. This must be something of a Utah/Idaho colloquialism, because I definitely heard it outside of my immediate family. It took four years of gentle teasing from my college roommates for me to break the habit. This usage is so ingrained that I feel like I'm putting on airs when I say, "I'm going to bathe my dog." It feels like it should be followed by, "And then will you have Wilson bring the car around? Ruby and I are going out for a puppy pedicure. Thank you so very much." However, "I'm going to bath my dog" sounds very, very wrong. So I choose to rephrase: "Ruby's getting a bath today."
